Typical DBZ Fan on YouTube Presents: Japanese Voices Sound Like Pussies

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So, often when I read YouTube comments on Japanese clips of Dragon Ball/Z/GT/Kai material, I often run into this little gem:

Yeah, "no offense".  
I know, that's so right, isn't it? I mean, clearly the entire cast is filled with girly, weak-sounding pansies. Just listen to these clips!

Ryo Horikawa as Vegeta:

I mean, really! Listen to that feminine, high pitched whiny voice for Japanese Vegeta. Jeez, what a woman. It's a good thing Chris Sabat saved this character with his all-too-distinct and not generic at all growly mean voice! 

Toshio Furukawa as Piccolo:

Listen to that feminine warble! I mean, seriously, Toshio Furukawa is probably a woman trying to sound tough, amirite?  

Tohru Furuya as Yamucha:

It's bad enough Yamucha is such a loser, but listen to that falsetto! Where's his balls? I guess Bulma sucked them off, amirite? More like Poo-ar did! AHAHAHA, WHAT A QUEER!

Hirotaka Suzuoki as Tenshinhan:

God, what a faggy voice. And he's even talking about his FEELINGS! You know, Nathan Johnson or Bruce Faulconer would have manned this scene up by putting some AWESOME HARD ROCK in this scene, maybe some techno-rock, fuck yeah. Tien sounds like a total bottom in this scene.

Ryusei Nakao as Freeza:

Toei totally ruined the character of Freeza by giving him that voice. I mean, Freeza's supposed to have a real butch voice, like my grandmother who smokes a lot. Something like that is totally more what Toriyama had in mind. Also, where's the funny jokes he tells? Like the one where he tears off an arm and says, "You can use it as a backscratcher!" Ahahahaaaa. Linda Young is the best. It's too bad they got that Chris Ayres guy to Freeza. He sounds like he tongue stabs men's fart boxes.

Norio Wakamoto as Cell:

This Norio Wakamoto guy is a weeaboo's fantasy. They're always taking about how great he is, but look what a fag he sounds like in this clip. I mean, he's got a voice that a little baby fairy might have. The last time I heared this voice, it was Ned Beatty squealing like a pig in Deliverance. No, that was too manly. This is more like the stupid new voice of Gohan in Kai. That's  another stupid voice, because boys don't sound like this.

JAPANESE VOICES SOUND LIKE SUCH FAGS! DUHR HUHR HUHR HUHR! 

Thank God Funimation came along and gave DBZ some balls. HARDCORE balls. After all, DBZ is a show about manly badasses. That's how Funimation originally made it. I wish the Japanese version would be like it's originally intended to be!

- typicaldbzfanonyoutube